About me
I am an author of dark/adult humor and horror as well as the co-founder and associate editor at Skullvines Press.
Every Wednesday from 3-6pm EST, I cohost as Grimm on The Metal Crypt, which can be found at Hard Rock Radio Live, a top ten Internet radio station. It’s uncensored and pretty wild, playing hard rock and metal throughout with guests ranging from horror authors to rock musicians. S.D. Hintz, my good friend and owner of Skullvines Press, is kind enough to put together the YouTube videos of interviews.
I spend most of my days at home caring for my disabled wife, Robin, who suffers from schizophrenia and has appeared in the comic book, Buffy the Vampire Slayer, Season 8, #10. She’s a real sweetheart and her hallucinations, etc, keep things interesting when I’m not working from my own insanity. I was once diagnosed schizophrenic so I have literally been there and back. My skull had been shoved into my brain in a car accident in ‘92. Among many other problems, the bipolar region of my brain was swelling under the pressure and therefore kicking in overdrive. But as John Astin used to say in Night Court, “I’m much better now.” Having experienced it all firsthand, however, I know exactly where Robin is coming from when she’s having episodes, so I work with her to “talk her down.”
And there were a few years after my skull was fixed – in the late 90s – that I actually missed the unstable reality, so I did a lot of acid and shrooms while in Florida. Fun times. I never did anything stronger than that, though, and while I’ve nothing against pot, I never was a fan of it. I also wrote the first incarnation of the serial, FEAR THE WOODS, during those times, which was then titled THE OAK CLAN.
So anyway, there’s a little history to help in understanding whatever it is I write here. I hope it helps.
November 28, 2008 at 2:00 pm
Now that’s a bio!
Sounds like one helluva ride, my bud. Had some years like that in my past so I smell what you’re saying.
You keep that Skullvine and Metal Crypt creative mojo taunting the masses and make sure to give your lovely lady a hug.
GLR
November 28, 2008 at 6:10 pm
Thanks Greg! I hope to get into more details of this and that through my blog, kind of a memory lane on shuffle, typing up whatever time of my life I happened to be thinking of at the moment. Robin has had a crazier life, though, so when she feels like it, I’ll sit her down with me here.
It shouldn’t be boring, at least
December 2, 2008 at 12:30 am
I also think the shrooms and the acid are what help me relate to folks who have to live with a hallucinatory reality. Though I chose to have mine, and Robin didn’t choose hers, there is still a way in which I can better relate to and sympathize with the terror that Robin has to live with, and better understand the shifting/temporary nature of our so-called “real” reality.
I look forward to whatever Robin ever feels like saying here, whenever that may be.
December 2, 2008 at 12:54 am
QuoterGal! It’s great to see you here.
And agreed, there are plenty of people out there who bask in the belief that they’re “crazy” and how cool it is, but they mistake tripping as being exactly like schizophrenia. True, the feel of it is very similar, but the tripper knows he or she will be okay in a few hours. The schizophrenic person does not. Furthermore, an experienced tripper can get out of a bad trip and make it a good one, whereas a schizophrenic is generally in a perpetual bad trip. Since they have no real hold on reality, they have no base experience to compare their hallucinations to. So they can’t look at something and say, “That can’t exist. I must be seeing things.”
Another thing is the hallucinations aren’t just audio and visual, but actual thoughts popping in your mind that aren’t your own. That’s where the paranoid schizophrenia comes in. A thought pops up that everyone around you wants to kill you. You’re unsure of where the thought came from, and it’s easy to confuse it with your genuine thoughts, so you end up accepting it. Eventually, your body will react to it so you’re seeing people coming after you, etc, making the hallucination seem that much more “real.”
I’m no doctor, of course. These are just things I’ve learned from experience and from living with Robin. It really is Hell for these poor souls. And as you said, tripping can indeed help a person relate from a safer perspective. For her, it’s a bad trip that never ends. She gets to pop into reality with the help of her meds, but otherwise she’s suffering.
I’m mixing Robin’s tales throughout the blog, so feel free to browse around. Anything regarding her is either straight from her mouth or I’d read it to her prior to posting – for her approval and to be sure I’ve got my facts straight.
December 13, 2008 at 10:16 am
Um, Jerrod, how do I email you once you stop using your MySpace page?
December 13, 2008 at 12:54 pm
The new MySpace page I started will be my main one. I’m just letting the other one linger a bit while I let friends know. I’ve changed the link here at “Jerrod’s Sites” so the MySpace link goes to the new one now. I can also be contacted at JerrodBalzer@gmail.com.